Timely Criticism

Most of us struggle with delivering criticism in a constructive way. Paradoxically, the stronger the relationship, the more difficult honest communication can be. When both parties are concerned about hurting each others' feelings, they often postpone honest feedback, hoping that the problem will simply go away.

In a business setting, this attitude can be destructive and dangerous. I often tell managers that the first time they notice a bad behavior, they need to think of it as the tip of the iceberg. For every time a manager observes a problem, other employees have observed the problem dozens of time.

For example, if a subordinate has a habit of interrupting others while they are talking, a boss may not want to interrupt them in order to point it out. So too often the opportunity for correction passes by. The next time the same individual interrupts someone, the manager may remember the previous time, and get upset. Rather than expressing their anger in the moment, they vow to address the behavior soon.

Unfortunately, by the time the manager finally brings up their concerns, they've been keeping score for a while. Instead of giving feedback in the moment about a specific instance of interruption, they end up unloading weeks of frustration on the unsuspecting individual. And that individual is likely to react defensively, rather than listening and learning. If the manager had simply brought up their concern the first time, the conversation could have been less emotional.

Please don’t wait and allow issues to simmer. Nip them the bud!